Dirty Jokes: 10/01/12
A man goes to a new doctor for a physical, and during the exam the doctor is amazed to discover the man has five penises.
"I've never seen anything like this," exclaims the doctor. "How do your pants fit?"
The man responds, "Like a glove."
A frustrated wife buys a pair of crotchless panties in an attempt to spice up her dead sex-life. She puts them on, together with a short skirt and sits on the sofa opposite her husband.
At strategic moments she uncrosses her legs, enough times that her husband finally asks, "Are you wearing crotchless panties?"
"Y-e-s-s," she answers with a seductive smile.
"Thank God - I thought you were sitting on the cat."
"An 83-year-old male prostitute was arrested. Police say he only charged $20 an hour, but for most of that time, he just talked about his grandkids." -Craig Ferguson
I was chatting to this girl in the pub last night and telling her of my uncanny ability to be able to tell the day any woman was born by holding their breasts in my hands.
She thought I was having her on but was curious none the less. Eventually curiosity got the better of her and she said go on then give it a try!
I stood there feeling her breasts for about a minute before she finally lost her patience and asked, "So? When was I born?"
I replied, "Yesterday."
"I've never seen anything like this," exclaims the doctor. "How do your pants fit?"
The man responds, "Like a glove."
A frustrated wife buys a pair of crotchless panties in an attempt to spice up her dead sex-life. She puts them on, together with a short skirt and sits on the sofa opposite her husband.
At strategic moments she uncrosses her legs, enough times that her husband finally asks, "Are you wearing crotchless panties?"
"Y-e-s-s," she answers with a seductive smile.
"Thank God - I thought you were sitting on the cat."
"An 83-year-old male prostitute was arrested. Police say he only charged $20 an hour, but for most of that time, he just talked about his grandkids." -Craig Ferguson
I was chatting to this girl in the pub last night and telling her of my uncanny ability to be able to tell the day any woman was born by holding their breasts in my hands.
She thought I was having her on but was curious none the less. Eventually curiosity got the better of her and she said go on then give it a try!
I stood there feeling her breasts for about a minute before she finally lost her patience and asked, "So? When was I born?"
I replied, "Yesterday."
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